Can Do: DONE!

Kids, remember way back when I told you a little ditty about the powder room at The Manor? Well, yours truly has done and rid herself of the evil thetans possessing the john. No longer must I view this horror:

At first glance, it doesn't look so bad, right? Yeah, that's what I thought when I originally moved into The Manor two years ago. It's amazing what you notice when you actually live in a space. While it's not popcorn ceilings and avocado green cabinetry, it was enough. Let's break it down, shall we?

Say hello to the teeny tiny window to Hogwarts, strategically covered by an ill-fitting schmate. Gorgeous, I know. You are a bunch of jealous bitches, admit it!


And also? The floors were badly damaged, so much so that the toilet did not sit evenly and actually wobbled when I placed my delicate bee-hind on this tilt-o-whirl. Oh, and let's not overlook the functional yet ridiculous two panel radiator strategically positioned in the center of the room. Because radiant heat is an absolutely essential feature in a 56 square foot room.

The toilet actually stuck out further than the door. Smart design feature, no? It takes a gen-u-wine ark-ee-tek to conjure up that kind of brilliance. And kids, this is no ordinary toilet! It's one that doesn't flush all the way! Any takers? There's a line forming around the block!


One more alluring feature of this lovely sanctuary is the absence of a functioning lock, always a treat for guests of The Manor. Someone apparently really wanted in there. That's what he said!

And now, my dear poodles? The horror is no more! Shazam!


I wish I could figure out how to take a decent photograph of the bathroom, but with the angles and lighting, it's darn near impossible. Anyhoo, our contractors gutted the joint, exposing the 120 year old wood (The Manor was built in 1889) and a few stray pieces of original wallpaper under the baseboards (which I may frame and hang).


The toilet has been repositioned to face inward, which is much more convenient for closing the door (yes, it closes and locks now, which I'm sure is a relief to guests at The Manor). The toilet is by Toto and the thing is one solid unit, weighing in at about 300 pounds. It took three guys to bring it into the house!

The mirror was the last piece to arrive. Actually, the intention was to keep the original mirror, but after repositioning the light fixture, the mirror did not properly fit the space. Aaaah, just an excuse to snatch up this one from Williams Sonoma Home. The towels, fixtures and vanity are all from Restoration Hardware, as is the soap dispenser. The tray is from Pottery Barn. The westie soap is an homage to Piper.

Gone are the teeny tiny window and the miniature radiator! This heating unit is far less conspicuous and painted the color of the baseboard. The colors are Benjamin Moore Plymouth Rock (#1543) with Classic Gray (#1548) trim. The floor is a basketweave white carrara marble tile with black dot and it has a bit of brown in it, tying the entire room together.

I'm currently contemplating putting a small bench or table or something in front of the heater or in the corner, and of course, adding artwork to warm it up. Big ups to my awesome contractor, who did incredible work, tolerated my incessant pestering and was on budget and on time. Woot!

Have a great Labor Day Weekend everyone!

Happy Labor Day

Anyone want to shop at Banana Republic this weekend?

You're Welcome!

Early Bird

It's never to early to plan ahead!

Bitter, Table For One

Lots of you have asked about what the hub purchased for my birthday. Ready for this?

1. Purple sweatpants
2. Crocs
3. A knife sharpener

Honestly. It's a good thing I have a brand new bathroom to smile at (photos tomorrow, peeps!).

Anyway, I'm getting a birthday do-over.

Sweet Stuff

Who doesn't love a cupcake? These lacquer canisters are cute and cheap. Just like me!

Boggle-ing

This coffee table is made up of antique-style printers' blocks with raised numbers and letters painted in 10 different colors.

Giddyup!

New hotness, from Coach.

Shameless Plug

Today is my birthday. Whoop di frikkin do!

Here's hoping that the hub does not bestow any of the following as "gifts": books from the bargain table at Barnes & Noble, DVDs from the bargain bin at Borders, stuffed animals of any ilk, flowers from the grocery store, candy of any kind, cash, or the "go out and do whatever you want" cop-out (I do that anyway). I have a whole frikkin blog of hints and I hope he got one. I love him to death, but if you all could see the parade of horribles that have been bestowed over the years, you would have the same 'tude.

So ... in the comments below, post your worst birthday present ever. And I mean the WORST!

Image courtesy of whatiftheworld gallery.

It's Monday

You might as well arrive to the coolest desk in the office!

Bring in da Crew, Bring in da Fug

Anyone who has been reading this blog knows that I absolutely love J. Crew. Okay, I'm a slave to the Crew. And I was eagerly anticipating the new arrivals (as I am every month). This time, however, I am seriously sick about what I have just seen.

This literally burned my eyes right out of their sockets. What the phuck is that? A tank top with voluminous ruffles around the hips and ass, just what every girl needs and wants. Good call, Crew. For $650, you too can have a fat ass!

And then there's this:

This must be part of some kind of elaborate intra-office contest that goes something like this: What idiot/asshole can we dupe into spending $2200 (not a typo) on this hair calf, snow leopard print cropped jacket? Surely the winner of this trip to the planet Ridiculon will be wearing this:

That's right, folks, half a cardigan. A leopard print, beaded cardigan. And it can be yours for $2800 (not a typo either). Sleeves are extra, apparently.

I may be a slave to da 'Crew, but these are seriously bad. These departures from the good ole Crew we know and love are a total embarrassment. And those prices for those pieces? I have two words for that: Bitch, PLEASE.

Ask Jennifer: Post Maternity Wardrobe

While Colie moves into her new abode and reassesses her decoratin' desires, another damsel in distress is in need of the services of Ask Jennifer. Sheila writes:

I am expecting the newest member of my clan in a few weeks. That being said, I am already on the prowl for some post maternity goodies! I am sick to death of my maternity wardrobe and am ready for some stylin!!! I won't be back in office until Dec, but I would like to show up looking fab ... bus cas, of course! Help!

Congratulations on the newest addition to your family! Now, as for the task at hand, the key to a post maternity work wardrobe is to accentuate the positive and camouflage the negative because, really, even after you lose the baby weight nothing returns to the same place right away. And you don't really want to be spending a whole lotta cheese on the post-maternity wear because you won't be wearing it for all that long. So now I'm going to shut up and bring on the goodies! That's what he said!


Yesterday I extolled the virtues of one Patrick Robinson, savior of The Gap. And look what he has done here! For $68, this 100% wool belted cardigan can be yours, and it's perfect over a pair of pants, a dress, jeans or a skirt. It's forgiving enough to accommodate a variety of post-baby size changes.


I'm a big advocate of a shift dress, which is both flattering and forgiving and as a result, hides many flaws. This versatile Calvin Klein cowl neck knit number is $118. Pair it with tights and boots and you're good to go!

Nothing like a cord skirt to scream fall has arrived! This one from J. Crew is $68 and has lycra so it's stretchy and forgiving. And cute, in six different colors!


The big challenge is on top because as much as you and everyone else may admire your new shape, it might be a good idea to cover that up in the office. First is a BCBG silk puff sleeve top is very forgiving and covers up all the right spots. And, it's on sale for $63.20. The second one is equally forgiving and stylish, from Banana Republic for $64.

Sheila, I hope I gave you some good options. Good luck!!!

A Wolf In Sheep's Clothing

Although you wouldn't know it from the terrible photo above, this chair from Ye Olde Barn is fantastic. This little guy has a nice round shape and is seriously comfortable. Me likey.

Mind The Gap

All hail Patrick Robinson!!! Why?

Becasue he has taken on the daunting task of turning what had become The Crap back into what should be The Gap. Good golly, this is a daunting task, but from the looks of what recently popped up over there, things may have turned a corner ...


Boyfriend peacoat, you are so going to be mine! $148

Jersey shirtdress looks pretty good going! $54


New low rise boot cut jeans, with all the designer details without the designer price. $59.50


Tab neck sweater jacket, just as good as Vince! $68


Cowl neck sweater, perfect for fall! $58

AND, as a bonus, look at what's on the horizon for winter!

I'll be checking this out, stat!

Sunny Days

Happiness is patent yellow Marc Jacobs sandals.

70 percent off. Lordy!

Good Dog!

I think I had a similar sweater in the sixth grade. Adorbs!

Three of a Kind

What kid wouldn't love these in their room?!

Just Wrong.

What the hell kind of g-d nonsense is this?

Who's There?

The good folks at Daily Candy have offered up a 25% discount for one of my favorite purveyors of paper goods, Knock Knock. Use the code KKBTS and get your kicks with some of these goodies:

In need of a good fib? This book of Excuses and Lies will do the trick!

No explanation necessary.

The perfect gift for your passive aggressive friends!


I think I wrote this book! But really, it was just an excuse to post a picture of Piper ... behaving inappropriately again.


I know, I know. I deserve one of these:

Ask Jennifer: Colie Needs Help, Part 2

The second installment in Ask Jennifer: Colie Needs Help relates to bar stools. And, like the table lamps, Colie needs some cheapola, high stylista numbers to go in her breakfast bar area between the kitchen and living areas in the new apartment. That means, my friends, that I have to come up with two bar stools for under $100. Not a lot of options out there, unfortunately. This is when I usually recommend a trip to Homegoods and my boyfriend TJ (Maxx). Anyway ...

To give you some context, Colie is a wee little one, not fresh out of college, but pretty darn close, and her current design aesthetic is way more contemporary than mine, so I'm looking for choices that she may actually use. Colie reports that the kitchen has dark counters, blonde wood and white appliances (keeping my mouth shut ...). Colie is open to black, wood or bright colors for the stools (excluding red, orange and pink -- remember, those hot rod couches? Yeah.). Let's get it on!

Ikea does it again with the Sebastian bar stool for $49.99. These modern little numbers are inoffensive and stylish, and bonus for the little footrest down at the bottom.

Slightly outside of her price range, and not of this planet, is this modern barstool from overstock.com at $59.99. Bonus points because it's adjustable.

Look! A combination of the two above, again slightly outside of her price range. The set of two Airlift stools is $119.99 at Targhetto.

This Chrome Retro bar stool is also, you guessed it, slightly outside of her price range at $59.99.

This solid wood, classic styled barstool is $69.99 at J.C. Penney. And you think that's out of her price range? Guess again because I shazamed up a coupon -- SURVAUG8 for 15% off! You know I can hook you up, girl!

Yes, I would totally give Colie the twenty bucks to make up the difference if she went with the more expensive options. I'm a good sister like that! More Colie assistance coming up soon.

Splash!

For the inner Olympian in all of us.

My First Thought

I love how these two are sticking their tushies out!

Afloat

This bathing beauties shower curtain beyond adorbs!